Alcohol Intervention

Time is of the essence when trying to help someone with an alcohol addiction. However, waiting for too long means the addiction has had time to embed itself deeper, making it harder to break free.

We understand the severity of an alcohol intervention, and we know that it takes courage and deep care to organise and carry it out.

Use this help guide to help you know whether an intervention is needed and to plan the best steps to provide your addicted loved one with a light in the darkest of times.

What exactly is an alcohol intervention?

For a person caught in the deep grips of addiction, there may come a time when they lose every aspect of control, and outside help is the only thing that will suffice. This is called an intervention, a planned process where each member can air their grievances and the group can offer concrete outcomes, which their loved one hopefully follows.

An alcohol intervention specifically helps a loved one with their drinking problem. In the majority of interventions, family and close friends of the addicted person will design and carry it out, though outside help from a professional “interventionist” is sometimes used.

A well-designed intervention strives to be free of accusations and blaming, instead working towards a moment of clarity where an addicted person understands how they may have hurt others, and just how much support and love stems from the people around them.

For some people, an intervention becomes the only way to break through the force of addiction and kickstart the recovery process, and we hope that every person who needs support manages to find it.

What makes alcohol interventions so difficult to approach?

The word “intervention” automatically evokes a certain weight and severity in our ears. Many of us see it as a “last resort,” and most addicted people understand that it is not painless for their loved ones to have to use drastic measures.

Knowing that you need to create an intervention for your loved one can be deeply worrying. It is best to remember that if your love towards them was not there in the first place, you may have already turned your back on them and offered no support, through “tough love” or otherwise.

Please remember, the benefits of sustained sobriety will outweigh your loved one’s desire to continue to hurt themselves and others. With care and consideration, your intervention can convey this message of love.

How can I know when alcohol intervention is needed?

It is natural to have apprehensions about carrying out something that feels severe. There are, however, a few clear-cut indicators that your loved one needs help:

• Risky behaviours putting safety at stake: Firstly, no one should be put in harm’s way due to a loved one’s drinking. This includes physical aggression, drink-driving, reckless behaviours and violent outbursts. Their alcohol use should never compromise your safety.
• Previous expressions of worries went unheard: Your previous attempts to get through to them may have been ignored, or they may have made you promises around drinking, only to shatter them.
• Health or well-being showing signs of decline: Your loved one may be frequently sick, showing signs of health deterioration and blackouts. They might also be missing work and important events due to drinking.

Recognising these signs doesn’t mean that intervention is the only way forward, but they suggest that a group consensus should be made among people who have their best interests at heart.

What are the key steps in preparing an alcohol intervention?

If you’ve decided that an intervention is needed, you should understand that failing to plan is planning to fail. Without organising it beforehand, an intervention is more likely to spiral into a heated match with stinging accusations and people being left unheard.

Use these steps to design a more thoughtful intervention for your loved one:

1. Create your “intervention circle” first

Firstly, consider the people who comprise your “intervention circle.” It should be all people who are directly affected by their drinking, as well as those close enough to understand the sensitivities involved. Each person should write down their statements on how their drinking makes them feel, as well as specific dates and times they have been let down or hurt. Everyone in the circle will need enough time to express themselves in the intervention, and it can be helpful to create a shared goal or outcome as a group.

It will help to use “I statements” to express your feelings with less blame and accusations, such as:

• “I miss the sober version of you I used to know, who helped me…”
• “I feel scared when you go out drinking and I don’t hear from you for days. There was an instance when…”

In creating your intervention circle, you should also decide, as a group, whether outside help from a professional interventionist is needed.

2. Select a calm and neutral environment

After creating your group, it is essential to select the appropriate setting for the intervention site. A thoughtful setting should be away from personal spaces, so that the loved one does not feel intruded upon or decide to retreat to the sanctity of their own room. Instead, choose a quiet, neutral location, away from public eyes, so that you can express yourself most clearly. Once chosen, commit to it.

3. Say what needs to be said, with treatment options

Now is the time to carry out the intervention, with care. Each person should remember to speak with empathy and try their best not to interrupt others. Nobody should feel like they have to shy away from saying what’s in their hearts. Everyone needs ample time to give their share, uninterrupted. After each person has spoken, dialogue can open.

It is also crucial to be forward-thinking and to research treatment options beforehand. Let your loved one know you have taken that measure and that options are available for them. Rehab centres for alcohol use disorders specifically may be their best option. Your loved one may feel overwhelmed, and preparing a path for them can help ease their worries.

4. Make your boundaries clear, and what actions are needed

You should ensure your intervention ends with clarity, both in what you hope they choose and in the repercussions if they refuse help. Boundaries are not always painless to set, but they can help you to protect yourself from a destructive alcohol addiction.

Some lines to help could be:

• “If you choose to refuse help, I need to take a step back from our relationship to protect myself from…”
• “If you refuse treatment, I cannot be expected to keep covering for you with lies to friends, family and employers…”

Try to finish with a step they can say yes to, even if it’s relatively small, such as “Will you speak to a treatment provider before….” It is better to be proactive in your statements, as your loved one most likely needs more help than they admit to.

Where can I turn for guidance and treatment?

If you’re considering alcohol intervention for a loved one, you have already taken a powerful first step for their future. Helping them overcome alcohol use disorder will be challenging, but you are not alone on your journey, and neither are they.

Here at Liberty House, we support families through every stage of recovery, including the first giant step of planning and executing an alcohol intervention. Our team is ready to give you the guidance you need to help your loved one break free from addiction.

Reach out to us today to take that first step towards the kind of future your loved one wants: strong, healthy and free from addiction.